Get in the Habit for Free Coupons!

I'm not a fan of cutting out coupons from the newspaper each week, but occasionally the mood strikes me and I cut them out. I'm always amazed at the amount that I save at the cash register-- so why don't I do it more often?

In the past several months, I have gotten into the habit of checking out free coupon sites. I recently found a coupon for a free appetizer at a local restaurant by searching for free coupons. I just discovered a new coupon site: CouponChief. CouponChief has coupon codes for online purchases. So before you make a purchase online, check to see if there are any coupons available for the items you plan to purchase.

The nice thing about CouponChief is that it keeps track of the coupons you've used or searched for in the past. You can find them easily again. There's a weekly newsletter to keep you updated on the deals.

This week's special has an online deal at Target: Spend $50 and get $5 off.

Another Crazy Lawsuit-- Warlick and Ramsell Argue Over Bears Tickets

Once upon a time, Douglas Warlick and Donald Ramsell were friends. The two lawyers from a western suburb of Chicago, attended Bears games together for over twenty years.

Back in 1985, Warlick purchased four Bears season tickets in his name. Just four years ago, Ramsell began purchasing two of the tickets from Warlick in an "agreement" that the two friends struck up to split costs. No contract was signed nor anything written down.

The friendship began to go sour, and on May 30th of this year, Ramsell filed a lawsuit in court to formally obtain his half of the tickets.

Warlick, in a recent Chicago Tribune article, summed the situation up perfectly: "I'm still in shock -- that's so obnoxious, so immature," he said. "He could've just picked up the phone. I think 'sad' is an appropriate word for somebody who does something like that."

When Adversity Turns Into a Blessing

Stephen Hopson, over at Adversity University, has tagged me for a post on the Secrets of Overcoming Adversity. I thought I'd share about a tough time in my life which actually turned into a blessing:

I grew up as a "solitaire", a term that Gina Oliva, author of Alone in the Mainstream uses to describe a deaf or hard of hearing child who is the only one in a school of hearing students.

Born with normal hearing, I became hard of hearing in elementary school and obtained my first hearing aid at the age of nine. By the time I started middle school, I was lipreading my teachers and fellow students and fooling everyone into thinking that I could hear pretty well.

I was even fooling myself.

When I was in eighth grade, it became apparent to my mom that I needed more help in school. Up to that point, I was getting yearly hearing tests and speech therapy--that was the extent of my "support services" at school. My mother tried to convince me to attend a local high school that had a program serving deaf students. The students used sign language interpreters.

"No way," I told my mom. "I'm going to attend the same high school with all of my hearing friends. I'm not deaf."

Never mind the fact that I couldn't use the telephone nor follow group conversations. Every day, after school, I took my hearing aid off and kept it off each summer. The hearing aid often gave me headaches and it didn't contribute much to my understanding of speech. I was relying nearly 100% on my ability to lipread.

So off I went to high school. I was fortunate to have a group of friends who I could communicate with. I hung out with a couple of girls from the swim team and I fell in love with a boy on the guys' swim team. The telephone was a nightmare for me. Since my mom was deaf, I often had to wait until my father arrived home from work and asked him to make phone calls for me. If he was in a cranky mood, I was out of luck. I quickly learned to ask my local friends down the block to make calls for me. It sure wasn't fun communicating through a third party to set up dates.

I quickly became the "Queen of Social Bluffing" in high school. It was the only way to save face; if a bunch of people at a party were laughing together, you'd find me laughing right along. Heaven forbid if anyone came in and asked me, "What's everyone laughing about?" I'd mumble something and head off to the bathroom.

After I graduated from high school, I attended a local community college. I applied for jobs around town and ended up working at a neighbor's restaurant washing dishes. I also babysat for extra money. Even though I still had my core group of friends, I found myself feeling lonely. I could communicate one-on-one just fine, but I sure wasn't having much fun at parties. At one point, I stopped going out at night because it was too hard to communicate in the dark or even with a single light on in a car.

I had visited Northern Illinois University during my senior year in high school and saw that they had two floors in a co-ed dorm filled with deaf and hard of hearing students. Instead of jumping at the chance to go away to college and meet other deaf and hard of hearing students, I turned it down for the same reason as I turned down the high school program: I didn't know American Sign Language. I didn't need it. I was doing just fine bluffing my way through life, thankyouverymuch.

By the end of my first year at the community college, I knew I needed to go away to college. Going away was going to be my only ticket out of the house, because I couldn't seem to find a job that was going to get me an apartment. So I applied to NIU and I was accepted.

That summer, I was barefooting (waterskiing on bare feet) a lot on Christie Lake. One day, I turned to cross the wake and fell. I slammed into the water sideways--there was no time to tuck and roll. I was a little sore afterwards and my ears felt as if they were filled with water and I couldn't hear. In the past, I could shake my head and blow my ears and I would be fine. This time, nothing happened. I just shrugged it off, thinking it would clear up later.

The day I headed out to NIU, I still couldn't hear. Just before heading out the door, I started bawling. My mom was upset enough about having her youngest go off to college, so she urged me to reconsider. "You can stay here and finish college!" I shook my head and we headed off.

As it turned out, becoming deaf was a blessing in disguise. While I mourned the loss of hearing and had to get used to wearing a hearing aid 24/7, I was also learning a new visual language and discovering a whole group of deaf and hard of hearing people to communicate with. I met my husband and fell in love, not only with him but with a whole group of friends that I still hang around with today.

So today, I feel blessed to have deaf, hard of hearing and hearing friends and the ability to communicate with them all.

I'm passing the Secrets of Overcoming Adversity baton on to Dawn Colclasure. Here's her entry: Being a Burn Survivor.

Note: It is with great sadness that I share the news that Gina Oliva's husband recently passed away.

The Debt Diet and Today's Prices

This morning, I sat down to watch Oprah's Debt Diet and catch up with the families that started the debt diet a year ago. The families made great strides in cutting into their debt and making some changes. Most of them reported that their marriages improved and they gained a sense of working together as a result of the Debt Diet. The advice from the money gurus (Jean Chatzky, author of Make Money, Not Excuses, David Bach, author of The Automatic Millionaire and Girl, Get Your Credit Straight!) all had the same advice: Stop spending, sell some of your stuff, increase your income, and pay off your debt.

Sounds so simple, doesn't it?

The hubby and I have made some changes here and there lately and cut back on our spending and gas use. We've been staying home more and the kids took their lunch to school more frequently instead of purchasing the school lunches.

Yet, this week, the Chicago Sun Times reported that food prices are on the rise and the cost of eggs has risen 81%.

So I guess that means we'll be eating less eggs this summer.

Medical Coding--A Deaf Professional Manages a Team

(Left: Julia Anderson, right: Cathy Smyth)

Ask Julia Anderson about her job and she'll tell you she "loves it!" Julia is a Clinical Data Coordinator at Advocate Christ Medical Center/Hope Chidren's Hospital in Oak Lawn, Illinois. She graduated from the National Technical Institute for the Deaf (NTID) in 1991 with a degree in Medical Records. She went on to obtain certification as a Registered Health Information Technician and Certified Coding Specialist.

Yes, she's been coding for 16 years and still loves it.

Julia communicates in American Sign Language and utilizes interpreters for meetings. On the job, she had to come up with innovative ways to communicate with her co-workers. "I do not use the phone," says Julia. "Email is my main source of communication. The associates in my hospital who I work with know that email is the best way to contact me.

"I use paper and pen to communicate with co-workers, Julia continues. "Sometimes I will use a computer or laptop as well. If co-workers have questions, they will sign, fingerspell or email me."

Julia, along with another coordinator, supervises a staff of 24 medical coders and 4 unbilled staff. Julia's path to becoming a coordinator was not an easy one. Back in 1999, while working as a coder, Julia applied to become a coordinator. She didn't get the job and was quite disappointed. The job was given to Cathy Smyth, who happened to have a sister who was hard of hearing. As it turned out, Julia completed her internship years ago with Cathy's sister at Advocate Christ Medical Center.

In the beginning, Cathy and Julia communicated via paper and pencil. Cathy learned to fingerspell and slowly picked up signs. Today, Cathy and Julia communicate fluently in American Sign Language. Several other co-workers are learning sign as well.

When the coordinator job opened up again four years ago, Cathy encouraged Julia to apply. This time, she obtained the job and continues to enjoy it today. "In my personal opinion," Julia reflects back, "the director at that time did not think I was capable of doing the job due to the communication barrier.

"I ended up proving her wrong when I got the second chance at the coordinator position."

The Face Behind The Blog--More Stuff About Me

I've been given a gentle nudge by Phil Gerbyshak to share the "other side of me."

The Face Behind The Blog meme was started by David Airey, who urged bloggers to show a personal side with photographs. Photographs allow the reader to get to know the blog author in a new light.

So the other day, while browsing through several photographs on the computer, my son stopped me at the photo below:


"Oh neat, Mom!" my son exclaimed. "Is that one of those photos where your head is on someone else's body?"

After the stabbing pain in my heart subsided, I informed my firstborn that yes, indeed, that was his mom's body twenty years ago. His eyes grew wide.

So while we're examining the past, the photo below shows me on top of my first pyramid, rounding a bend in the lake and hanging on for dear life:


That's me on the upper left and my friend Jenny Oehl on the right. Bobby Kruso and Brent Greenwood are on the bottom left-- but I can't remember who the guy on the right is. I'm sure his aching back has recovered.

Fast forward many years and many pounds later:


I'm with my brother Dennis and my father. They just finished chopping down three pine trees and I'm hauling them off to a field on the four-wheeler.

Now that I'm older, I'm usually found behind the wheel of the boat, dragging my kids around the lake. Here's my youngest son on the tube, the other two have been flung off after hitting a wave.


When I'm not blogging here, I'm usually meeting families at my early intervention job or at my staff writing job for an internet company. Every once in a while, I go out and do presentations for Hands & Voices (seen here with Jane Holtz, another mom and IL Hands & Voices board member):


I'm married to a great guy (most of the time!) and I have three kids who occasionally pick up after themselves. I dream of having a chef, a maid and a personal shopper to take over the stuff I hate to do.

Heck, what I need is a wife of my own!

This Is What Happens When You Don't Brush Your Teeth

Wordless Wednesday-- need I say more?

Hawaii--On My List of Places to Visit

My sister-in-law has her 50th birthday all planned out:

She's heading to Hawaii.

So I've found a neat website where one can rent out places on Hawaii: Hawaii Beachfront Cottages. One three bedroom home can be rented for $200 per night. Keep in mind that some of the homes require a 30-day rental. Hawaii certainly isn't cheap, but heck, for the sunset below-- I'd stay 30 days myself!


Check out this four-bedroom house that sleeps eight: Big Island House--at $1,200 per night--four couples could share a vacation together with memories to last a lifetime.

The same site even has a blog about Hawaii: Hawaiian Beach Rental Blog.
Now all I have to do is write a couple of bestsellers so I can join my sis-in-law next year!

Another Deaf Author Discovered--Connie Briscoe

A couple of weeks ago, during a search for authors who are deaf or hard of hearing, I stumbled upon Connie Briscoe. In the mid 1990's, Connie rocketed to the bestseller list with her first novel, Sisters and Lovers. Connie is deaf and the former editor of the American Annals of the Deaf.

You can read more about Connie in a Gallaudet interview and in Jamie Burke's interview.

Connie's newest book is Jewels, a collection of fifty stories about African American women over the age of fifty. Connie includes her own personal story in this book. I plan to order this photographic book using the gift certificates that I've earned from My Points--Earn Rewards at MyPoints.
.

Yesterday, I headed over the library and found two of her books: P. G. County and Can't Get Enough.

I'm on chapter three of P.G. County and fascinated by the way Connie introduces characters. I have a feeling I'm going to like her books. On page seven, they've already gotten into some hot, steamy action.

I'm off to read more.

Ten Things About Me--Aren't You Thrilled?

I've been tagged by Christy at Christy's Coffee Break to share "Ten Interesting Things About Me."

So here goes:

1) My favorite color is purple. Oddly enough, I don't have much purple in my house, but my college roommate and I once won a decorating contest for the "Best Dorm Room." It was covered in purple, of course.

2) I love books. I belong to BookHands, a bookclub where everyone is deaf. We converse using sign language.

3) Toxic people drive me nuts. I'm on a mission to eliminate the toxic people in my life. Life is too short for people who have a negative view of life.

4) I once surprised my husband by driving off with a friend's motorcycle. He had no clue that I knew how to ride one. A special thanks goes to Tim Brown, who taught me to ride his dirt bike one summer.

5) Speaking of fast things, I'm on a mission to get a jet ski by next summer. It's a harmless way to handle a mid-life crisis. Hmm... should I start a "Jet Ski For Karen" fund?

6) I love steak. More specifically, I love steak from Outback. Nothing puts a smile on my face quicker than a gift card from Outback. The hubby knows just how to score on Mother's Day, Christmas and my birthday.

7) I'm stone deaf when my hearing aids come out. Don't bother arguing with me--I have a magical "off" switch on my hearing aids.

8) My ultimate favorite organization is Hands & Voices. I've met a lot of neat people there.

9) I hate housework. My mom loves it. She is so disappointed that the "clean" gene somehow skipped me. Fortunately, when my mom visits, the fridge gets cleaned out, the cabinets get wiped down and the blinds get vacuumed. I'm trying to convince my mom to visit more often.

10) Enough about me-- tell me something about YOU. You're next!

Deaf Swimmer Makes a Splash

Will Landgren is in the pool for two hours each day, swimming laps and practicing his turns six days a week. In August, Will be competing in the World Deaf Swimming Championships in Taiwan.

"Baseball is my favorite sport," says Will, "But swimming is a close second."

During the summer, Will has practice each day, two hours in the morning and two hours in the evening.

Will is profoundly deaf and cannot hear the starting gun. "I use a light strobe," Will explains. "I have an interpreter at practice so I can talk to my teammates and find out what the coach is saying. Sometimes I talk to the other swimmers myself with my voice."

Each swimmer has to raise funds for the trip to Taiwan. To support Will at the competition, his local team has set up an online fundraiser to help Will gather the six thousand dollars he will need to participate. To donate funds for Will, visit: Palatine Park District Tigersharks Swim Team.

My Final Class and a Ripple In The Pond

On a perfectly calm night, you can toss a stone into Christie Lake and watch the ripples build up. One ripple causes the next ripple, which sets the motion for yet another one...

Tonight will mark my final "Conversational Sign Language" class at Joliet Junior College. I have been teaching at JJC since the early 90's and now I'm passing the baton on to Chris Laskowski, a physical education teacher who is deaf.

I've had my share of memorable students over the years. The youngest student was three years old and the oldest was 82. One student had suffered a stroke and was learning to communicate again. Several couples have taken the class to communicate with each other after losing their hearing. I have had classes as large as sixty students and some as small as six. I've had two students who have taken my class two times in a row and they've gone on to take the next level class two times as well.

Families with deaf and hard of hearing children frequently take my class and often bring the grandparents and sometimes the kids. One mom of a deaf child went on to become an interpreter. She once interpreted for me at a meeting at a local intervention agency. This mom also teaches sign classes at her local park district. Another student went on to graduate from Columbia College and now works as a full-time freelance interpreter. I recently had the honor of having her interpret for me during a meeting downtown.

I've also ran into former students in many different places. Several times I have gone into restaurants and discovered that the server has taken a class. I've found students at the post office, conferences and bookstores. It is difficult to remember all of the students after years of teaching but it's always special to come across them years down the road.

Back in the early 90's, I hosted a "Silent Day" in my hometown at a local church. I had forgotten all about that day until I received a phone call from Shirley Armstrong, one of the ladies who attended that event. She invited me to a breakfast as a thank you for the teaching I had done in my community years ago.

On Saturday, I had the honor and pleasure of having breakfast with a group of women from the Jubilee Baptist Church. Shirley in the picture on the far left) introduced me to the ladies from the church who continued to study American Sign Language year after year.

It's amazing how a ripple in the pond can continue many years later.

Psst, Come Here--Wanna See My Curtains?

About three years ago, we moved down the street to a larger house. For three years, our living room remained decorated with flat white paint and the builder's thirteen dollar, gold-plated light arrangements.

I am not known for my decorating skills, but I do have a knack for accepting other people's stuff--which is how my sis-in-law's curtains ended up decorating the family room windows, my aunt's lamp on a table and my mother in-law's kitchen table ended up in the dining room.

So one day, the hubby and I looked at each other and had the same thought--let's paint the living room. We were avoiding it for a long time because of the soaring ceilings. When inspiration hits, we roll with it. Our problem is, we often run out of inspiration in the middle of a home job and leave things halfway done.

Or we run out of money.

But this time, we got the job done and sat back to admire the soft yellow walls. We admired the new lights that we put up over the hand-me-down table.

Yet, the room still looked bare and unfinished. We knew we needed curtains, so we set out to find some. Due to the high ceilings, we quickly learned that we would have to either make them or have them custom made.

Either way, it wasn't going to be cheap.

One day, I was at my neighbor's house picking up the youngest kiddo and I noticed that she had some nice white curtains hanging up. We have the same soaring ceilings. "Nice curtains," I commented. "Where did you get them?"

"Oh, those are tablecloths!" she replied. "From Linens and Things!"

I was flabbergasted.

So I ran over to Linens and Things and found a beautiful gold color tablecloth in the perfect length.

For eighteen bucks each!

SOBCon-- A Learning Experience

My eyes have recovered.

After seven hours of absorbing information second-hand from two interpreters, I have recovered from the SOBCon that was held in Rosemont on Saturday.

When I first arrived, I was greeted by Phil Gerbyshak, the "Relationship Geek." I had just discovered his blog a few days before the event but I recognized him after a few seconds and confirmed it with a glance at his name tag. Phil has an exuberant personality and he urges his readers to "Make it Great!" Phil spoke later on about the importance of being authentic and being yourself in your blog.

I met Liz Strauss in front of the registration desk and thanked her for providing the interpreters for the event. It was wonderful to meet her in person after reading her blog and learning from it for the last few weeks. Just as I settled in my seat, Terry Starbucker and Wendy Piersall came bounding up and offered big hugs. Phil, Liz, Terry and Wendy-- what a nice welcome to receive!

I really enjoyed the small group discussion but I found myself suddenly shy and quiet. A couple of times I wanted to throw in suggestions but I couldn't make myself speak up. Anyone who knows me usually can find me yakking away, so I left the conference feeling like I needed another day to get to know everyone. Perhaps if I had been able to attend on Friday night, I might have felt more comfortable at speaking out.

I learned a few things about blogging at this conference and I'm making my way through the blogs from the list of attendees. Terry Starbucker was the perfect MC and his winning personality (not to mention his singing, which the interpreters said was pretty good!) added a special touch to the day.

To top it off, the lunch was absolutely delicious!

An IEP Meeting Ends Well

Back in March, we had an IEP (Individual Education Plan) meeting with our school district that did not end well. The hubby and I had requested a change of schools for our son David. David is deaf and attends our local school with a sign language interpreter. We wanted to send him to Hinsdale South, a school that has nearly 70 deaf students. You can read about the previous meeting here.

After that disappointing meeting, we contacted a few lawyers and Equip for Equality. Leeanne Seaver, the director of Hands & Voices reminded me to get everything in writing and hand-deliver a letter to the IEP team. I sat down to write a three-page letter and delivered it to the team and included the superintendent and principal. I followed up with a phone call and I reminded everyone of the outcome that we desired.

So today, we had David's placement meeting and it went rather well. Beth (the mom of the 12 pound baby) attended as our advocate. Only one teacher voiced a bit of opposition this time but we were able to work through that. This teacher had children of her own in special education and was a big supporter of inclusion. We were fortunate that a social worker with a background in deaf education spoke in support as well as David's itinerant teacher. We ended up with the placement at Hinsdale South.

David is looking forward to attending the same school that his father went to. His friend Aubrey (Beth's daughter)is also going. The two of them have been friends since they were babies and they are excited about finally going to school together.

Deaf Freedom Cruise 2007

At the end of October, the Royal Caribbean Freedom of the Seas will set sail with over 4,000 passengers. For the first time in history, the cruise will consist of deaf and hard of hearing passengers.

On the entire ship.

That's right, the Deaf Freedom Cruise will be the first time an entire cruise ship is devoted to deaf and hard of hearing passengers. This cruise was made possible by the hard work and dedication of the staff of Passages Deaf Travel.

Passages Deaf Travel is owned by Tabitha and Max Partlow, a husband and wife team. Tabitha first became involved with the Deaf community when she went to college to become an interpreter. The idea of creating a travel business devoted to deaf and hard of hearing persons came about when they attended a cruise with twenty-two other deaf passengers. Despite being promised interpreters and room kits, the deaf passengers boarded the ship only to find out there were none.
"It was at that point that Mac and I realized the need for travel agents to specialize in deaf travel" said Tabitha.

Last year, the team hosted Adventure Cruise 2006 with a group of 350 deaf and hard of hearing travelers aboard Royal Caribbean's Adventure of the Seas. "We had such a wonderful response to that cruise that I wondered if enough people would be interested enough to fill an entire ship," said Tabitha.

"When we had this idea," she continued, "I went to many different cruise companies to see who wanted to do this. Some cruise companies turned me down. Royal Caribbean and Carnival wanted to do it. Royal Caribbean really stepped up and decided to provide the interpreters and room kits at no additional cost to our clients." Real-time captioning will also be provided.

The staff of Royal Caribbean also convinced Tabitha that she could fill up the newest and biggest ship, Freedom of the Seas. "I wasn't thinking about the biggest cruise ship at the time... but Royal Caribbean talked us into it," she said. "Now I am thrilled, it is the best ship!"

Over 3,800 people have booked their rooms and the ship is nearly at capacity. Fully booked, it will hold 4,100 people. Royal Caribbean plans to take pictures of all of the passengers together, but will have to divide it up into four pictures. "Perhaps we can put all four pictures together to make big one!" Tabitha chuckled.
Current sponsors of the trip include Hands On VRS, Worldvuer, DeafNation and Crown Jewelers and more. Entertainment will be provided by some well-known performers, including John Maucere, Bernard Bragg, Keith Wann and CJ Jones. "Keith Wann will have a morning talk show that will air on TV in each cabin, every morning!" said Tabitha. "Keith will talk about the events happening that day, weather, dinner, and other things. Each day, he will interview someone from the ship."

This cruise is the accumulation of a dream for Tabitha. "We feel that the travel industry should provide more access for deaf people" said Tabitha.

"Maybe once they see how successful Deaf Freedom Cruise is... maybe they will come around."

View the DeafNation video of Freedom of the Seas

$65 Million Dollars for a pair of pants-- Absurd!

What would you do if the local dry cleaning establishment lost your favorite pair of pants?

Like most people, you would get a little upset. You might become tremendously pissed off and make the establishment refund you for the cost of the dry cleaning and the pants. At worse, you'd haul them off to small claims court and let a judge settle the case.

Then you'd go out and buy another pair of pants and go off to work.

Like most people.

Apparently, Roy Pearson isn't like most people. He's a judge from Washington, D.C. who decided to take his own case to court and sue the local dry cleaners to the tune of $65 million dollars.

For losing his pants.

The Chungs, who own the dry cleaning establishment, have done everything they can to remedy the issue without going to court. They've offered plenty of money to replace the suit and settle the matter. An offer of twelve grand did nothing to satisfy Mr. Pearson.

He's still dragging them to court and asking for $65 million dollars for the inconvenience of having to rent a car and drive across town to use another dry cleaners.

To top it off, the Chungs claim that they have found his pants.

Let's hope a more level-headed judge will throw this case out and make Pearson pay for this absurd use of our legal system.

And to help this case out, I've got a perfectly good suit sitting in my husband's closet-- Pearson, do you want it?

Deaf Characters in Books--All In One Place

For as long as I can remember, I have always had my nose buried in a book. My mom used to complain when I brought a book to the dinner table. Recently, while doing some surfing on the internet, I came across a compilation of books that have deaf or hard of hearing characters in them on My Shelf.

Brenda, the website owner, has a personal interest in books with deaf characters. Her 24-year-old son is deaf. One day in 1998, she decided to put together a list of fiction books. Today, you will find books on American Sign Language and other non-fiction topics as well. Brenda has read many of the books herself, and provides a summary of each as well as personal notes on some of them.

Check it out: My Shelf-- Deaf Characters

Disabled, Schmabled--Blogging Against Disablism

Over at Diary of a Goldfish, they're Blogging About Disablism. Simply put, Disablism is right up there with a long line of "isms," which boils down to a simple word: discrimination. I also call it a reality based on fear or discomfort.

As many of you know, the hubby and I are deaf and we're raising three deaf and hard of hearing kids. At first glance, we don't look any different from the hundreds of families in our neighborhood. We're just another family in the typical American tract home, driving three kids in two cars to three different activities on the same day.

Glance at us a second time, and you'll find hearing aids in each of our ears. Our youngest son sports red, white and blue earmolds. We've gone through quite a few color combinations throughout the years, including the blue and white swirls in honor of their school colors. Your eyes might catch us signing or tapping each other on the shoulder.

Invite us to a party and you find that we might be a bit quiet at times. Joining in on group conversations is nearly impossible for us. Our eyes simply can't play ping pong with conversations. As soon as we've lipread one conversation and turn to lipread a response from someone else, the conversation moves yet again. That's why we love people who are willing to understand the logistics of group conversation and slow down until we've made eye contact and take turns speaking. Unfortunately, it's a rare occasion when this happens. That's why we like our activities with a group of deaf and hard of hearing friends-- conversation flows and the communication barriers fall to the wayside. I get riled up when people tell me that we need to be "in the real world with hearing people." Believe me, we're in the real world everyday. I just like my world accessible.

We have a couple of people in our lives that have that "deer in the headlights" look whenever they're around us. They're quite uncomfortable making conversation and they offer a few sentences and then dart away. There's no real deep meaningful dialogue because they're so afraid of having to repeat themselves and the tension runs too high. Sometimes we joke about slipping a few anti-anxiety pills in their coffee.

Making a phone call to us can be a bit tricky but it is improving with technology all the time. We now have a regular number that people can call without us having to explain what a relay service is. In years past, we would have to give out an 800 number and our home phone number and people would often give up before attempting to call us. We still have kinks to work out with people who hang up when they get an operator instead of us directly.

The invention that I personally love right now is the videophone. I use a wireless phone to talk to people directly and I have an interpreter on a screen in front of me who signs everything that is being said. Most of the time, conversation flows pretty easily with this method.

Around the internet, I identify myself as "Deaf Mom." It's me, it's who I am, it's a part of me 24/7. Being deaf is so much a part of me that if you can't see beyond the lack of hearing stuff, then you've got a disability of your own.

A Brief Moment of Wishing... for Hearing

On Monday, I attended Austin's birth with my friend Beth and her husband. During the twelve hours of labor, various nurses, the doctor and family members came in and out of the room.

For a couple of moments throughout the day, I briefly wished I could hear.

Don't get me wrong. I feel quite comfortable with myself and I'm assertive enough to ask people to repeat what is being said. So it's not a matter of accepting that I'm deaf. I was comfortable enough to feel that I didn't need an interpreter.

However, there are always situations that come up where asking to repeat things can't happen. For example, one of the husband's friends came into the room and a lot of conversation was flowing. I couldn't join in, since it was moving far too fast for me. A new nurse would come in every couple of hours and I would have to get used to lipreading a different person all day long. Those are the kinds of situations that deaf and hard of hearing people face on a daily basis and frequently get left out of, because there's no polite way to join in the conversation and comprehend everything that's being said.

I've attended two of Beth's births previously and felt quite comfortable supporting her. We've been friends for fourteen years. When it came time to push, I was on one side holding one leg, the hubby was on the other side. Pushing was moving alone routinely.

In the middle of Austin's birth, all hell broke loose. The doctor called a code and suddenly the room filled with doctors and nurses. I, of course, couldn't hear what was going on. Beth's husband mouthed the words, "They're calling for a cesarean!" Austin was stuck.

For several frightening minutes, there was a lot of yelling. I saw the doctor go in with both hands, and I knew instinctively that there was little time to spare. A nurse jumped on top of Beth and applied pressure. I knew those were emergency measures and something inside of me made me lean over Beth and urge her to push.

"Beth, push!"

And somewhere during the moments of praying, watching, and holding my breath, a thought suddenly popped into my mind.

I wish I could hear what everyone is saying.

The thought quickly disappeared as the events unfolded. Austin was brought to the baby warmer and for several heart-wrenching minutes, we didn't know if he was going to make it. It took a few minutes to get him breathing and he pinked up.

It wasn't until today that I reflected back on all that had happened and about that thought that had popped in to my head.

Why in the world, in the middle of all that was happening, did I wish that I could hear?

The more I thought about it, the more I realized why: when I urged Beth to push, I was operating on instinct. There was no way for me to hear the doctor's instructions.

What if I was wrong? What if pushing at that moment was not the right thing to do.

What if my lack of hearing and understanding had hurt my friend?

So it had me wondering about deaf and hard of hearing doctors and nurses-- there are several of them around the U.S.-- how do they handle emergency situations when a code is called?

Stay tuned as I find out more.